NOW HIRING

If you know anyone who needs a job my office is looking. It's a very sad day really. Hailey is moving to LA in February. I love this girl and the shoes will be hard to fill. Especially since no one really knows what size shoe she wears. She just wears shoes she likes whether she has to stuff the toes or wear them two sizes to small.

But seriously. If you know someone who meets the following requirements, please let me know.

1. Must be able to work at least 30 hours a week not including all the times the boss will call you on your cell phone.
2. Must be able to live with no benefits, sick days or vacation days. Though I've been told by working 40 hours a week someone would be eligible for benefits. I'm just not willing to give up my schedule to find out. We do get holidays off with pay.
3. Must be able to alphabetize. Hailey isn't so great at this but she's so tall and pretty we don't care. If you are tall and pretty like Hailey, we may let the alphabetizing slide.
4. Must let most things the boss says roll off your back. While she may criticize, a lot, and blame you for things you didn't do or even did correctly, it's really just how she is. She has no clue she is being hateful and won't apologize because of this lack of knowledge on her part. No sissies allowed.
5. Must be able to stick up for one's self and sometimes SAY NO. Because: see #4.
6. Must be able to use the computer programs such as Access, Excel, Word and Outlook. Internet Explorer is also helpful as that is the program I am using as I type. This is a very important quality because neither of the bosses can use a computer. God love them.
7. Must be able to answer the phone with the energy of a two year old. Of course, after three years I have yet to master that task.
8. Must be willing to listen to the 9th person of the day call and say they have the most beautiful baby in town. "I mean- really- I do! I'm not just saying that because I'm her mother!"
9. Must be able to enter data into the computer on a weekly basis. This task is very important. It is tedious but necessary.
10. Must be able to multi-task. It's not easy to answer phone, respond to emails, blog and drink a latte all at the same time.

So there you have it. I'm sure we'll have people lining up to fill her spot.

Happy Friday!